Friday, March 7, 2008

Friday Nite Confessions

Last week I watched this television program where the wife admitted 'on national T.V.' that she had an affair. The poor schmuck husband cried - right on national T.V. Wow, I bet those rating went through the skylight. So now I find myself in the same drama dilemma. Do I admit to my hubby about ME & Dennis?

What about this relationship with ME and Dennis? How do I describe it? Was it flirting? Or should I read more into it?

It started in the produce department at Sweetbay - our favorite place to be several times a week. Sorta like our 'hangout'. Me and hubby not ME and Dennis.

So I'm standing there drooling (spit and all) over the luscious Plant City strawberries. Oh!!! they are the best!!! I pick the 2 pounder and drop it into the empty basket. Out of nowhere comes the produce man. He smiles and says, "Have a great day."

I respond back, "Thank you, I will." And I move over to the pepper section. Two aisles later here comes the produce man - coming right at me with something in his hand. Did I knock down a display of veggies in the produce section? I'm really good at that.

He thrusts out this bouquet of flowers and says, "Here these are for you."

I'm thinking WHOA - whats up with this? My budget this week is minuscule so I'm thinking I can't afford expensive cut flowers. I think I gave him my dementia look.

He says, "This is a thank you for shopping at Sweetbay today. My name is Dennis. Tell the cashier these are from me."

I thank him and wheel the cart down the cereal aisle. I'm not used to these random acts of kindness. So I work my way up to the register with a cart overflowing with groceries and a busted budget.

I tell the cashier that Dennis said these were for me and there was no charge.

She says, "Sure?" Okay what does that mean? Does she think there is something going on with ME and Dennis? How often does Dennis do this? Did he think my ogling was for him and not the Plant City strawberries? Oh the drama.

So do I spill my guts to hubby - go on national T.V. and tell him there? What was the name of that stupid show anyways? I need to dispose of the evidence of my 'whatever' with my secret admirer. I give the beautiful bouquet to my grandson who gives them to his girlfriend who gets all mushy and weepy.

He says, "Here I bought these for you." So the lies continue.

I begin to put the groceries away and realize how much STUFF I bought. AHAH, it was a marketing ploy to get me to spend more money. And it worked. Do I embellish the saga, get the flowers back from the girlfriend and tell hubby about ME and Dennis?

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