Friday, July 31, 2009

Cash for Clunkers

We took advantage of the 'Cash for Clunkers' program and darn glad we did. We were not in the market for a new vehicle and did not necessarily need one but we could not pass up this deal. We traded in an old gas guzzler van with a broken windshield, bald tires, 200,000 miles and making lots of strange noises. I beleive the old girl was on her last legs or wheels.
The new vehicle - 29 miles per gallon (average) is small, cute and practical - 3 % interest from the credit union for 2 years - seems like a bargain.

Lots of interest about this program that could be over.

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Forked tongues, appendages and evil deeds

Beware of those that speak with a forked tongue. Many reptiles have forked tongues and Harry Potter can speak Parseltongue. Only Harry Potter fans will understand this language.

Stay away from anyone who speakith with forked tongue. Do not listen to them, acknowledge their words or associate with them as they are perceived as the devil or worse. There is an evil darkness that surrounds and mystifies those who speakith with forked tongues.

This very morning I saw a strange species of anole, during my early morning swim in the pool. He was clinging to the screened lanai - waiting for prey. Anole's do not speak and I am not sure if they have forked tongues. This mutant critter did have a fork and it was not in his mouth. He had a forked tail. Oh my! Is a forked tail similar in darkness and evil as a forked tongue?

I slipped quietly from the pool - dripping wet I made my way into the house. The telltale water splashed across the tile floor was evidence that I did not even dry off before entering. I was on a mission. Get the camera - quick. Capture on film this mutant anole with the forked tale. Perhaps he is a new species never before recorded in Florida history. Maybe he was smuggled to Florida from the rain forest. It could be a possibility that I could become famous with the capture (photo) of this rare creature. Or I could take a video (like the Bigfoot video) and become world famous or a jokester gone awry.

I eased my way back outside into the lanai. With very slow movement, high expectations and the thrill of the chase I lifted my camera to catch an image of this strange forked tailed creature for posterity and admiration. Yes, the thought of making money from my photo of this new species of anole exploded in my mind. Doom, darkness and a bit of evil overtook my aspirations of fame. The fool ran off into the bush that leans ever so precariously against the lanai. DRATS!!!!

I will wait for him and watch with the camera always nearby to catch his image and prove to the world or at least myself that a new species or a mutant lives in my backyard.

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

turned a whiter shade of pale

I am constantly hearing negatives about the new and improved 'health care' system. Politicians are unable to agree on anything that would benefit the American people. Most if not ALL politicians have no worries concerning their health care benefits. First with the salaries they bring home they could afford to pay most of their medical services out of pocket. And for sure their health benefits are right up there next to the gold package. I do not know this for a fact but from what I have observed their benefits and perks out way a normal working individual.

The use of planes to fly on personal business or vacations. The police protection that follows the lieutenant Governor of Florida around all the time. And on and on it goes.

There are so many Americans that are not insured or are under insured - they are forgotten. I have health insurance but still co-pays and prescriptions dry me out. I am thankful for my medical insurance - without that coverage I would be destitute.

Why can't we all just get along and do what is right for the people - ALL the people. Why can't the politicians work as a team? What are our true goals?

A Whiter Shade of Pale
Brooker / Fisher / Reid

We skipped the light fandango
turned cartwheels 'cross the floor
I was feeling kinda seasick
but the crowd called out for more
The room was humming harder
as the ceiling flew away
When we called out for another drink
the waiter brought a tray
And so it was that later
as the miller told his tale
that her face, at first just ghostly,
turned a whiter shade of pale
She said, 'There is no reason
and the truth is plain to see.
'But I wandered through my playing cards
and would not let her be
one of sixteen vestal virgins
who were leaving for the coast
and although my eyes were open
they might have just as well've been closed
She said, 'I'm home on shore leave,
'though in truth we were at sea
so I took her by the looking glass
and forced her to agree
saying, 'You must be the mermaid
who took Neptune for a ride.
'But she smiled at me so sadly
that my anger straightway died
If music be the food of love
then laughter is its queen
and likewise if behind is in front
then dirt in truth is clean
My mouth by then like cardboard
seemed to slip straight through my head
So we crash-dived straightway quickly
and attacked the ocean bed

Monday, July 27, 2009

Goodnight Chet

Items lost, hero's put to rest. Things stay the same and change. Familiarity makes us feel confident, loved and sure of ourselves.

The voice of Walter Cronkite will forever be etched in my mind. An icon forever. Someone will take his place and life goes on. Slowly he will disappear from our memories like leaves falling off trees. Like dust in the wind. Spring brings new life and new buds.

Wedgies, clogs, water buffalos, high top sneakers and - my favorite Crocs. Falling into the great pit of oblivion. A fad no longer fashionable. Something else will replace them and they will become just a passing memory. I have since moved on to 'fitflops'. They will not collect dust beneath my bed but will forever keep the 'under the bed monster' away from me.

A mainstay that hopefully will never go away are 'Kinos'.

What is the correlation between a hero - Walter Cronkite and a pair of shoes? Security, freedom and a sense of knowing who you are and what molds you.

Sunday, July 26, 2009

Paper Weight

This morning I picked up the local Sunday paper from a corner hawker. I have stopped purchasing my paper from the metal paper machine bandit. The walk kills two birds with one stone. Yuck - I hate killing animals or other critters - except for mosquito's and palmetto bugs. Palmetto bugs is a nice name for cockroaches. When I was a young innocent we called them palmetto bugs but now I know the truth. The whole truth and nothing but the truth. No one wants to say they have cockroaches in their home. So, we twist the truth and make it a little prettier. Back to the weight of paper.

I carried the paper home and realized how small it was. It is shrinking - right along with the economy. When I was that young and innocent child still thinking palmetto bugs were not cockroaches - I knew alot about the Sunday paper. I was up bright and early - way before the sun even thought about painting the morning sky orange and red. It was a family thing that we all had to participate in - no choices in this matter. I helped my dad and brothers put together the Sunday paper and bag them or rubber band them - depending on the weather. We had these brown - very narrow wax like paper bags that the Sunday paper was stuffed into in case of wet weather.

The papers were humongous. It took an art form to roll those papers and get them to fit inside those bags. I liked the mornings with no threat of rain - rubber bands. Mostly I remember trying to get that bundle of paper into the narrow sack.

Today the Sunday paper would have no problem fitting into that brown, waxy, narrow paper sack, although today we use plastic.

The paper that I walked home with seemed very lightweight and not at all like the papers from my youth or for that matter just a few years ago. What is happening to our papers? Why are they getting weightless? No news? No ads? No money to produce the paper? How much has this pathetic economy contributed to the shrinking newspaper? Soon, I will only be able to read the news online.

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Bats in the Belfry

Bats in the belfry or citrus rats in the outdoor shed. Both are disgusting, dirty, stinky and gross. We had citrus rats in the outdoor shed - not that I've had lots of citrus on my citrus trees. So why invade my space? That sounds like a t.v. reality show - Invading Spaces. Why not go to the neighbors that have tons of citrus - on the ground - decomposing.

My shed for whatever reason became their haven for dirty deeds. They ate two rugs and a nylon camping cot. It was a nice cot! Why would you eat a camping cot and rugs? I thought you were citrus rats not nylavoirs.

Creepy little animals and they sure made a stink. They are among the homeless as they have been eradicated from my shed. Most likely they will move on to another shed in another yard. Yuck, makes my skin crawl.

After the clean-up doused my hands with bleach, anti bacterial soap, hand sanitizer and then more bleach. Still feel dirty.

Sunday, July 19, 2009

5 ways to start your engine

Start the day with a song in your heart and a smile on your face. "Hello it's me', by Todd Rundgren. This morning I sat and looked at the eastern sky painted with streaks of orange and pink. Inspiring.

5 ways to make the day start off right.

1. meditate

2. watch the sunrise

3. dream

4. take a walk

5. blog

Saturday, July 18, 2009

Coming in for the final landing

Ode to Walter Cronkite. That voice. That stoic face. That presence. That secure feeling he produced. That history. That legacy.

Wednesday, July 15, 2009


His muscles tense and twitch in a slow rhythm keeping a steady pace with the slight breeze. His eyes big and round stare with a touch of fright and total concentration locked in place. A dog barks incessantly on the next street over. A car horn toots several times, tires squeal and the sound of metal crushing into metal fills the air. Far in the distance a siren wails, moving closer.

The engine of a lawn mover sputters to silence. A storm door creaks the hum of a heat pump and the roar of a chainsaw become melodies of the day. A lone wind chime tinkles in the breeze. The sprinkler hisses fast sending spurts of water droplets across the newly mown grass.

His ears now are arched toward the back of his head his nostrils flare ever so slightly. The grayness of the chain link fence melds into the dusk settling in for the evening. Little black hairs rise along his spine. A low soft growl leaks.

His paw reaches quickly and makes one slash through the rectangle in the chain link fence.
A small gray tabby returns the slap. Muscles twitching and whiskers flinching the fight drags on. Slow, methodical without the intensity or harm. It’s more like a warning or a threat. You stay on your side and I’ll stay on mine, guarding ones territory with the protection of the fence. Playing, teasing and testing knowing they are safe and secure behind the security wall.

The black cat shakes his head and lumbers under the shade of a mimosa tree. He lays partially hidden in the tangles of the unkempt flowers. The gray tabby paces along the fence searching for his foe with the fence shielding them from danger separating them from hostilities.
Darkness spills into the yard as the sun disappears for the day as both felines with their confidence waning dash for a safer place.

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Purveyor of Lost Thoughts

I'm not that touchy-feely sort of person - especially from strangers. This morning I walked to the corner to buy a paper from the corner paper hawker. I walk to the corner because I have been robbed too many times from the paper dispenser right around the corner from my house. So, I now boycott the paper dispense thief. The extra walk does me good. I always take the dog just in case there is a human robber ready to steal my four quarters from me.

I get to the corner and - behold - a new paper hawker. They do not seem to last very long, hhhmmm, I wonder why? Selling papers from a street corner is not a lifelong career. I hold up my hand to this new fella and he struts over to me and the dog - separated by a big metal railing. He makes small talk about the dog and I pull his leash away from him. Big boy - Ron is not a friendly chap - especially with strangers. Some people just don't get this about dogs. I tell them he's not stranger friendly and they make a stupid comment about all dogs liking them. Well my friend this dog doesn't like people and he will bite.

I hold out my four quarters to drop in the hawkers hand and he grasps my fingers and clutches them. Creepy. If I act concerned or frightened the Ronster man will notice and be on alert. If I scream he will attack. It's nice to have a protector at your side when paper hawkers are fondling your fingers. I do not want a lawsuit brought against me for a vicious dog.

I pull my hand back out of the paper hawkers grip of death and leave it dangling at my side. As soon as I get home I put on massive amounts of germicide and wash both hands with anti-bacterial soap and them rinse them in bleach. My creep out of the day.

Saturday, July 11, 2009

10 Places to Visit

10 places I have visited in the last 30 days.

1. Arches National Park in Utah. The scenery, the hiking and connecting with nature were awesome.

2. Canyonlands National Park in Utah. Standing in such vastness is overwhelming.

3. Dead Horse Point State Park in Utah. History was interesting and the colors were off the color chart.

4. Hole in the Rock in Utah. A very upscale tacky tourist trap. Great sculptures and a two story outhouse - what more can one ask for?

5. Park City in Utah. Stunning.

6. Tangier Island in Virginia. A wonderful ferry ride in the Chesapeake Bay to an island lost in time.

7. Pratts Falls in New York. A hidden gem right out in the open.

8. Chittenango Falls State Park in New York. Very much like its neighbor Pratts Falls.

9. Herkimer Diamond Mines in New York. A rose by any other name would be called a crystal.

10. Currituck Sound in North Carolina. A little bit of heaven, miles of shoreline and lots of mosquitos.

Ten awesome places that are permanently etched in my ramblin soul.