Sunday, July 12, 2009

Purveyor of Lost Thoughts

I'm not that touchy-feely sort of person - especially from strangers. This morning I walked to the corner to buy a paper from the corner paper hawker. I walk to the corner because I have been robbed too many times from the paper dispenser right around the corner from my house. So, I now boycott the paper dispense thief. The extra walk does me good. I always take the dog just in case there is a human robber ready to steal my four quarters from me.

I get to the corner and - behold - a new paper hawker. They do not seem to last very long, hhhmmm, I wonder why? Selling papers from a street corner is not a lifelong career. I hold up my hand to this new fella and he struts over to me and the dog - separated by a big metal railing. He makes small talk about the dog and I pull his leash away from him. Big boy - Ron is not a friendly chap - especially with strangers. Some people just don't get this about dogs. I tell them he's not stranger friendly and they make a stupid comment about all dogs liking them. Well my friend this dog doesn't like people and he will bite.

I hold out my four quarters to drop in the hawkers hand and he grasps my fingers and clutches them. Creepy. If I act concerned or frightened the Ronster man will notice and be on alert. If I scream he will attack. It's nice to have a protector at your side when paper hawkers are fondling your fingers. I do not want a lawsuit brought against me for a vicious dog.

I pull my hand back out of the paper hawkers grip of death and leave it dangling at my side. As soon as I get home I put on massive amounts of germicide and wash both hands with anti-bacterial soap and them rinse them in bleach. My creep out of the day.

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