House smells like dog

The house smells like a dog and not that cute sweet puppy breath smell. Stinky-wet dog smell. The kind that flips the contents of your stomach inside-outside-upside down. Thank you Dr. Zeus for reminding me of that wonderful rhyming book.

Mr. Smell-no-good gets a weekly or sometimes monthly bath and that is a major fun time. Within a few days Mr. Smell-no-good stinks again no matter what kind of perfume I spritz him with. The stench is nauseating. The house is closed up all day and this horrific offensive odor permeates everything.

Perhaps if Mr. Smell-no-good would stay in the garage the house would smell more like I want - such as a tropical paradise. I keep the garage cool for him with a gigantum double fan but no he prefers to keep his stench topside - inside, rather than outside.

I started putting chlorophyll (should have used chloroform) in his drinking water because I read that that will kill the smell. But 'he' who will not be named rearranged the garage and all the excess much needed but never used stuff. So my chlorophyll is somewhere in the depths of junque in the garage.

So Mr. Smell-no-good continues to stink up the house and climb on the couch. And I just wish for a dog that smells good or to find my bottle of chlorophyll.