Trash it Today

Today is the day. Today the inevitable will take place. It's destiny. Time has run out the clock is no longer ticking and the earth - well the earth is still doing what it's supposed to be doing. But - I have to complete the dreaded task. It's over. I might have even heard the fat lady singing or perhaps it was the neighbors dog howling. All good things must come to an end.

The air has cooled a bit and the breeze surely feels like an ocean breeze and not a warm ocean breeze. You can feel the change in the air. Winter is settling upon Florida. The solar heater will no longer be able to keep the pool at a swimmable 82 degrees. And for this wuss 82 degrees is a mite chilly. I really prefer 86 degrees.

I have made promises to hubby and to myself that the suit just has to go. The purple shimmery-shiny tank suit purchased over 10 years ago for 2 bucks off the clearance rack has seen its last hurrah. It has never faded - well only in a few spots where it has become translucent. The 6 inch tear down the side has been mended twice and has begun to tear again. The threads are so bare it's impossible to stitch it back together.

It has stretched enough to cover the bodies of two people. The elastic in the legs and around the armholes disappeared several years ago. The back end of the suit sags to the back of my knees - what a sight that is. It's the kind of suit you never wear in front of people for the peep show you might see. It's time to say good-bye - adios - so long. This will be a hard thing for me to do. Toss the sorry scrap of spandex in the trash. In some ways it just doesn't feel right.

But a promise is a promise and it looks so awful-awful bad. It no longer does the job it was cut out to do. It's a sorry looking sight and I am ever so glad no one sees it but me and hubby and even that is unbearable at times. Hubby makes rude comments quite often. So today the once spiffy-shiny purple tank suit will grace some landfill someplace. I would recycle her if I only knew how. It might make a scary Halloween decoration. The light bulb has gone on. she will look pretty scary hanging from the lamppost outside by the sidewalk.

Swim Naked

Florida living - for me - requires an in ground pool covered by a pool cage. A pool boy would be wonderful but, that ain't going to happen any time soon. However - there are some disadvantages to pool ownership. Not having a pool boy is not one of them.
The massive amounts of chemicals we dump in the pool has its consequences. We have friends who recently installed a salt system to their backyard oasis. The gap between us and the friends would be they have money to toss to the winds. So we survive with the chlorine laden water.
Chlorine has a devastating effect on swim attire, especially black attire. I do believe I could lie in the sun clad in my black bikini and get a tan right through the material. I know you can buy tan through swim wear at a hefty price. I bypassed that strategy by wearing my full length - skirt included swim wear in the pool for an entire year. The ravages of time have turned my suit into a skimpy see through stretched out barely acceptable rag.
It doesn't matter the quality or price of the swimsuit, the downfall and degradation of the weave is always there. So, trying to be green and save money (for that salt system) I have banned the wearing of swim wear in my backyard pool. I'm sure the neighbors get a good laugh. Actually we put up privacy screens around the lanai. One could be arrested for swimming ala naturelle in public. And the old guy next door may collapse from a coronary after taking in the view.
So irrational thoughts have swirled around inside my head, much like the automatic pool cleaner,( that does a sucky job but cost a small fortune) about starting a begging website for my needs. I heard there are many sites like that out there. One person had a blog for 'help me buy a boob job'. Whatever! I'm rather afraid that others will not fully understand my need for the salt system and not support my endeavor.
I have decided to toss in the towel and become a full time naked swimmer. Since I will not have to purchase that yearly $40.00 swimsuit I can pocket the money in a salt system account. Now - do the math - System - $4,000. - equals $40.00 a year times how many years? I'm thinking I will get there faster with a begging website.
Swim naked and save Lycra.

Ethel - put your clothes on

There's a large population of nudists in Florida. I'm sure there are nudists other places but I only know Florida. And when you live in Florida the heat can certainly cause you to rip off your clothes and go around buck necked.
I used to frequent a semi, underground, illegal nude beach (I'm not a nudist) in North Carolina. I went there for the peace and quiet. Honest. My swimsuit stayed on. There are some people who should not subject their exposed bodies to the world. And it seems like many nudists fall into that category. You don't usually see the model from Sports Illustrated strutting around the beach with uncovered body parts. It's usually grandpa and his even older honey. Wrinkled, flabby - lets not go there.
The nudists in Florida want to open a nude nursing home. So, I'm wondering about the nurses and staff? Do they prance around totally nude? Where are the pockets for the stethoscope and the prescription pad. My doctor always has his pockets stuffed with stuff. And the old folks - will they wear their depends? You know that saying - 'Over 50 - never trust a fart'.
Will they be barefooted also? Slipping and sliding down the pee lined hallway. Whatever floats your boat. Mine would sink along with me in it or I'd drop my paddle and not be able to retrieve it.
It's a scary thought going to see Gramma in the nursing home in that state of dress or undress. Some people you just shouldn't see buck necked.